not defined by…

there’s something about having an addiction that makes it begin to define you. who you are, how other people perceive you, how they treat you.

i have a friend who knows about my addiction and suddenly it’s become the thing that defines me to this person. every conversation for the last week or so has had some sort of involvement with it. any fluctuation of emotion might trigger something, according to said friend. if i’m sad, i might do it. if i get angry, i might go there. if said friend says something challenging, i might take it there.

i’m so tired of this being something that defines me. it’s not something that i have a problem with. it’s a defining characteristic.

what i do does not define who i am. who i am defines what i do. why does it always seem to go the other way? because it’s easier? is it easier to define someone by what they do? to take the little pieces, actions, and make those what defines a person.

what about what i believe? does that define who i am? do people see that, too?

is it impossible to believe that i don’t think about it all the time? is it impossible to believe that i can get better? is it impossible?

the truth is, i’m not defined by my downfalls. i’m not defined by my sins. i’m not defined by my shortcomings.

there are things that do define me. my status as a child of God. that defines me. my faith. that defines me.

what defines you?

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3 thoughts on “not defined by…

  1. courtney903 says:

    my music, the love in my heart that belongs to other people, my faith…

    love this post.

  2. katyhelena says:

    It can be easy to become defined by an addiction, by a struggle…harder to be defined by the positives, by your strengths.
    I am definitely defined by the One who saved my life and who keeps saving it every day, who is the only One who makes it possible for me not to be defined by my struggles…

  3. LensFlare says:

    Unfortunately human nature tends to make us define a person by their weakness and not their true substance. That’s far easier than examining the true qualities that make a person. We all have our weaknesses and it’s easy to dismiss a person because of them.

    But you know who you are, you know what makes you up as a person, and you know it’s not your addiction. It’s unfortunate that a person, and even more so that a friend, will now define you based on your addiction despite knowing the true you prior to knowing your addiction. Obviously it is a weakness and there is far more substance to you that stands out much more. Your good qualities outweigh your weakness is what I’m saying.

    A good post by the way!

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