the house that built me…

yeah… technically i’m back but i’m sure i needed the rest from being on the honeymoon. this is one of my IRL besties as well as a blogger bestie. while we live hours and states away from each from each other, we don’t let that get in our way of keeping in touch. so check out her blog and leave her some bloggy commenty love.

ps. it’s my birthday tomorrow!

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Hi.  I’m Courtney.

And lately I’ve been having a series of dreams that seem to have nothing to do with each other save for one factor:  They all take place in my childhood bedroom.

I left that place behind when I was 18, thinking I’d always be able to come back.  When I was 19, my parents also left it behind, and since then, I’ve wondered if the new owners kept my room purple for their little girl or painted it and made it their own.  Either way I’m not sure I want to know.

But it turns out, you can take the girl out of the bedroom, but you can’t take the bedroom out of the girl.

The room never looks quite like I remember leaving it, but I think my brain is redecorating it to my current tastes.  It’s a little strange.  I always know that’s where I am though.  The closet with two wooden doors, the windows each where they belong, the wooden trim throughout the room, and especially the view into the front yard out my window.  They all add up.

I think maybe that just became my learning place.  The place I escaped to when I was really happy about something and needed to jump up and down on the bed while my stereo blasted country music or Frank Sinatra, where I hid when I needed to cry and had to work it out before I’d let anybody else see me.  Where I learned to write songs and started a journal and embarked on my very first adventures into interior design.  The room made me who I am.

And maybe these dreams are showing up to remind me of that.  Or maybe to help me keep learning, since even though I pay for my own place of residence now and have a few little places I can escape to, it’s never really quite the same.

When life changes, we have no choice but to leave certain things behind for newer, better things.  That’s the way it works.  But maybe, in a way, we never actually have to leave them behind.  Not completely.

Thanks to Cari for letting me spill my dream brain all over her blog.  And here’s to that one wonderful change her life has just been through. Whatever you left behind, Cari, keep it in your heart always.

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ps. email me at cari [dot] vanoverbeke [at] gmail [dot] com if you want the new blog URL. moving SATURDAY MAY 22.

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