Enough already

Wowza! It’s been a long time since I’ve written on here.

I’ve thought it about it numerous times over the past weeks and months and crafted blog posts in my head and had ideas, but have never quite managed to follow through. Well enough already!

I say I love to write and I want to write and that, just maybe, I’m good at it, yet I hardly do it. I make excuses about kids and dogs and running and daycare and all the things that seem to get in the way of sitting down and getting the words on the page.

I’ve been feeling demotivated lately. We have recently moved to a new house in a new, beautiful and wonderful small town, and I haven’t managed to successfully find any new daycare kids. I’ve made sure to advertise locally and I need to remember to advertise online as well, but nothing yet. We need me to make some money, but being 7 1/2 months pregnant necessarily lands certain restrictions to that. I’ve been trying to find some viable freelance writing gigs and it seems that though content mills are the place to go for potentially easy work, none of them are really any good. Hassles and headaches and poor pay for the work – all of which sound completely marvelous, I know.

I do love spending my days with my little girl who is already 18 months old, walking, talking, in her toddler bed, out of the high chair and on a booster, up and down the stairs and chairs – she is so big already. The passage of time really gets me thinking though.

The title of my blog is “Living in Pursuit of Life”, but what really does that mean? What is life? Spending time with my kid(s)? Not having to worry about a job? Growing in my relationship with God? Finding meaning and fulfillment in my skills, hobbies, and abilities?

I think I need to get serious, but I’m not sure about what. I’m not sure which direction to go. I do know that I want to commit to more reading and more writing. Perhaps that is simply where to start. Just doing a little more than I was doing before.

How do you find motivation when you are feeling completely depleted and demotivated?